Thursday, June 18, 2009

a rant of sorts.

tonight i left my friend's house at about 11:35, and i just arrived home, at 12:40ish, from driving around my town. and thinking.

i've heard so many metaphors and similes as to what life is....
life's not a game to me.
life's not a bitch to me.
life's not a picnic to me.
life's not a highway to me.
life's not a lot of things for me.

i'm so sick of having to categorize myself.
even in a simple theory of what life means to me, i'm finding it hard to escape the ever-so tight lines of conformity.
is there ever a way to be original?
will anyone ever be able to sit there and say "i'm just me, i'm not like anyone else."?

why is it that each and every time you say something, you're thrown into a stereotype?
all people were not intended to be the same, that's for sure, but if we were meant to be individuals, why is it that all we do as humans is strive to be with ones that are alike ourselves?
what sense does that even make to begin with?

who am i?

i'm so confused.

if i say that i think life's a bitch, does that make me emo?
if i say that i think life's a picnic, does that make me an over-ecstatic prep?
if i say that i think life's a game, does that make me a lost soul; confused in their own heart?

where's the option for 'allison's mind'?

where can i go to say that my life is not like anyone else's, and that i just want to be myself... an original?

life to me is hard; but life to me is beautiful.

i'm past the point of caring if people think i'm a prep, or an emo, or a scenster.

i just wish it was easier for people to see me.
you know, the person that's really not like everyone else?
the one who's just living?
oh wait... is there even a difference?

there's gotta be another way to find myself...
one that doesn't include finding my own yellow-brick road to follow.

my life can't be defined by a simple click of my heels.
it's not all about where i am, where i'm going, or where i've been.
it's about how i'm doing it and who i trust to be there all the while.

that is what makes my life what it is:
my life is a tangled mess of emotions amidst a group of people who have the power to touch my heart more than they will ever know, and as i continue down my path, my life will be a constant ray of sunshine that only gets blocked by temporary clouds... for my life... is beautiful.

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